All posts by Jessica

A Frigidly Cold Shower

Beep! Beep! Smack! It was five in the morning. Too early for any college student to wake up but Jenny had a special reason. She had the amazing job of tending to the school’s special pony, Gypsy.

Rubbing her eyes, the hum of the heater came on but not too far away she could hear the incessant knocks on the stall door. Gypsy wanted breakfast and Gypsy wanted it now. But as far as Jenny was concerned, breakfast would have to wait until after her shower.

Scurrying into the bathroom, she turned the knob until a jet stream of frigidly cold water came blasting forth. She didn’t bother waiting for it to get warm and instead stripped down and aloud the rush of water over her ears drown out the noise from downstairs. She just wanted a minute to herself and she used that minute to try and jolt herself awake. After all, they say that a cold shower in the morning can do wonders to the body and mind. And so, it has become her ritual. But, she doesn’t linger too long just enough to perk up her eyes. If she prolonged Gypsy’s breakfast too much, he would probably bang open the stall door and amble up the stairs into the loft only to continue pounding on her bedroom door and her minute of peace.

It’s not to say that she didn’t love that little rascal but sometimes she dreamed of a day where he would learn to get his own oats and honey and not gobble down the whole tub. Someday her dream would come true but today Gypsy wasn’t about to grant her that wish.

© 2018 Jessica Santos

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His Silent Joy

I remember when I first held you
You cried and became my little songbird
I remember when you first began to walk
You ran and became my little cheetah
I remember when you first drove me mad
You hid and became my little mouse
I remember all the good and bad
But, what I remember the most is our last words
We fought hard and strong
You pleaded with all your might
Almost convinced me otherwise
But I was too far gone
Imprisoned within my own demons
I couldn’t see your tear stained pillow
I couldn’t hear your reason
Now years have passed
And I remember this all
I beg for things to change
Plead to be released
I miss my baby girl
Her sweet embrace and our hour long talks at night
Yet these chains hold me
They’ve thicken over the years
So as you climb your mountains
And face your demons
I must gaze from afar
Proud of your success

© 2018 Jessica Santos

Words

I want to pour my heart out
Reveal all the ways I love you
To be like the movies
Where the light dims down
Tears are shed
And we cling to one another
To be like a book
Where happiness is just the beginning
The story always continuing
And words fit right in
To be like the old couple
Where a glance shares it all
Memories create smiles
And silence is perfection
I want to pour my heart out
Reveal all the ways I love you
But, how should I say it
Should I tell you about your quirks?
How they drive me mad
But, if I ever was blind
I would know it was you
Should I tell you about your words?
How they cut me deep
But, if I ever was deaf
I would know what you would say
Or, maybe, I should keep it simple?
Make a list perhaps
Like a young teen in love
I don’t know what would be first though
The coffee on your breath
Or the burning calmness of your touch
I don’t know what to do
I want to tell you everything
But, I know you’re tired
It’s been a long day
So, for now, I guess I’ll settle with
I love you

© 2018 Jessica Santos

Bedtime

Late at night after work
You come over and curl up in bed
With me held in your arms
And the lights turned down
We share our day
And right before you drift off
You ask what I missed the most
And though you can’t see me
I close my eyes and smile
Breathing you in
As I hold you even closer
Thinking of our little moment
Where your breath touches my skin
Your hand reaches around my chest
Your warmth radiates on me
Your subtle twitches rub against my legs
And that happy feeling bubbles from within
By now, I know you’re about to fall asleep
So, I kiss your lips
Keeping the answer to myself
Even though I may have just given it away

© 2017 Jessica Santos

Never Meant To

It was never my intention to hurt you
I never meant to cause you pain
But now your tears weigh heavy on my chest
It’s like a ton of bricks pressing down
All I wanted was to tell you
How I truly felt inside
And though I may be clever with words
It is clear that I’m still learning
Cause my heart and mind are not one
For it’s true
It’s hard for me to open up
To show you how I really feel
I’ve always been afraid
But I know what I feel for you
And it kills me to see you this way
It was never my intention to hurt you
I never meant to cause you pain
But, now your tears weigh heavy on my chest
It’s like a ton of bricks pressing down
And though you ask for your space
I beg of you don’t push me away
Just tell me the truth
Help me learn
Give me your heart to mend
Because it was never my intention to hurt you
I never meant to cause you pain
Joy and laughter are the only things
That should grace your face
No tear of sadness to stain
So please don’t push me away
Please see my flaw
And help guide me on our way

© 2017 Jessica Santos